Arlene and two adopted dogs.

Just a blog from someone who loves to communicate with other dog owners

Funnies, because my life is boring right now.


Did you hear about the fat, alcoholic transvestite – All he wanted to do was eat, drink and be Mary

Got an e-mail today from a bored local housewife, 43, who was looking for some hot action!
So I sent her my ironing. That’ll keep the lazy woman busy.
I got invited to a party and was told to dress to kill. Apparently a turban, beard and a backpack wasn’t what they had in mind.
Paddy says to Mick, “Christmas is on Friday this year”. Mick said, “Let’s hope it’s not the 13th then.”

My mate just hired an Eastern European cleaner, took her 5 hours to hoover the house. Turns out she was a Slovak

Since the snow came all the wife has done is look through the window. If it gets any worse, I’ll have to let her in.

I’ve been charged with murder for killing a man with sandpaper. To be honest I only intended to rough him up a bit.

After years of research, scientists have discovered what makes women happy. Nothing.

A lad comes home from school and excitedly tells his dad that he had a part in the school play and he was playing a man who had been married for 25 years. The dad says, “Never mind son, maybe next year you’ll get a speaking part.”

Just had my water bill of £175 drop on my mat. That’s a lot. Oxfam can supply a whole African village for just £2 a month: time to change supplier I think.

2 women called at my door and asked what bread I ate, when I said white they gave me a lecture on the benefits of brown bread for 30 minutes…. I think they were Hovis Witnesses.

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3 Comments

  1. I know what you mean Anne, I can never remember jokes, I get so many through my dog friends forum, I just read, and delete, phttt! gone, unless \I feel like blogging them, like this.
    I hope it’s nothing serious with Beth Pen, But they do get restless when they get older, so let’s just hope it’s that.
    and no thanks I’ve got enough ironing right now, I have to put the board up with the iron out just to keep pricking my conscience, then I give in and do it.
    Tango and Ruby says, keep well Bess, we can’t have you poorly.

  2. I hope you’re feeling life is not so boring now,, and can I interest you in some ironing?.. NO? Worth a try…;-)
    You raised my spirits too, not a good day today, strange night, Bess was restless…and as I’m sharing the bed with her, we both kept waking!! (Hovis Witnesses indeed.. lol!!) hugs and woofs from Pen ‘n’ Bess, to you, Tango and Rubyxx

  3. Curiosity Abounds

    Ohhh groan but funny and the sorts one plans to remember so can amuse others but probably forgotten when recall needed! I’ll have to have a sneaky peek back here to refresh my memory.

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