They just don’t make mirrors like they used to do they, well not in my area.
Many years ago, when I’d get myself all spruced up to go out, I’d look in the mirror and see what I expected to see, that is, the results of my preening and pampering, and being quite content with the result I could go on out to wherever I was going feeling confident that though I might not exactly turn heads, I could pass in a crowd without frightening the horses or such-like.
Things have all changed, and all I can blame it on is the new fangled mirrors. Going to lunch with a friend the other day, I got myself smartened up as usual, putting on my make up carefully, tweaking and primping my hair to get the curls to frame my face ‘just so’ that I thought was the most flattering style. I could just picture what I looked like, again not maybe turning heads, well not too many [smirk] and I sally forth to meet Sue, . I passed a mirror and just had to glance to make sure everything was OK and horror of horrors, WHO THE HELL IS THAT WEARING THE SAME CLOTHES AS ME? but hang on, there’s something familiar about the face, but where were the plumped up lips, the wide doe eyes, the smooth skin? somehow the eyes have disappeared, the lips have got thinner, and what’s these marks running down from my nose to my mouth, it looks like pencil marks, what the hell is going on here. Can’t be me, that person is fatter, and stoops a bit, the clothes don’t quite fit, hell, I paid £50 for these trousers, she doesn’t wear them nearly as well, the backside’s a bit saggy. and that blouse, just like the one I paid £30 for, the front where the boobs should be, are sort of ‘droopy’ perhaps she’s not wearing a bra, looks like it. How could anyone go out like that, Some people have no taste, ugh and her hair, she’s going bald at the corners, in fact she hasn’t got half as much as I. have. I’d suggest a wig for her..
I see my friend is coming toward me I see her in the mirror and she’s come right up beside the hag, puts her arms round her and says, Hi Arlene ready to go for lunch?
I tell you they just don’t make mirrors like they used to.
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